When was the last time you had the time to catch up with what’s going on inside you? You know time to hang out, do nothing but read books, watch tv and sketch a bit in your long neglected drawing pad. Where you begin to experience feelings arise and thoughts or memories come to surface. Then you begin to, bit by bit – look at them inside out and all angles until you feel somewhat settled.
Time where you relax enough to drop down into finding out what’s bugging you and wonder why it took you so long to see it. Or can actually focus on where your energy is blocked, and tune into why your gut is tight, and your heart feels heavy. To discover what you are holding onto, what your inner self is trying to get you to notice?
Perhaps you do self-supportive care time already. Maybe you have a practise daily of meditating, yoga, and journaling for example. Maybe you got a dog just to walk by the ocean and undo all the stuff that has accumulated like a stagnant air around you, where you let the sea wind blow you clean of it. Wonderful, keep it up.
Yet, sometimes, especially after a huge growth/changing transitional time, we find ourselves in a state where we are unable to give a shit about doing anything. Of getting on with it or doing something useful. We are so into not doing anything and cant force ourselves with will. It’s not depression, it’s a precious need to pace yourself, to catch up with and let the deeper parts of you integrate all the stuff thats gone down,while you basically become a lazy slob. That’s when we find ourselves not wanting to get dressed, or go out into the world even though the sky is clear. We do what we damn well please. Often its a struggle to override the conditioning that pressures you to get dressed, to put on some battle paint and for god’s sake, go out into the day and enjoy it. The nagging mind is not fun and prevents us from truly experiencing the healing at such times.
It’s time to conquer the should’s, the conditioning that says we cant hang out on the couch watching Buffy reruns while smelling our armpits and let other body scents grow stronger to remind us that we are real, that we exist and have the right that any animal has to simply -rest.
If you find yourself in that state, really question your beliefs that you cant succumb to it for whatever reason. Take a sick day or two. Why wait until we deny ourselves what we need until our body’s messages to rest make us sick?
Stay with it instead. Trust that you will come out of it when the need is meet, when you care again and when you simply have the energy to get up and want to go have another realm with life. It’ll happen.
Think of it this way – It’s another form of re-wilding yourself.
Consider a chat with me if you find yourself wanting to understand your inner needs more…